|Dira Sudis (dira) wrote,|
@ 2012-06-08 11:07 pm UTC
Ahahahahaha that was HILARIOUSLY STUPID.
At some point fairly early on--before anyone died or was in more than NO YOU IDIOT STOP THAT IT'S GOING TO END BADLY peril--that I could no longer be scared by the movie because I was now ready for everyone to die. Because they were all too stupid to live.
Except Idris Elba and his two bickering dudes, who were smart enough to live; I was a little bit sad when they died except, you know, it meant the movie was almost over. They went out with dignity, at least.
David was also not too stupid to live, but was instead an excellent example of why you should not allow any kind of artificial intelligence to model itself on the T. E. Lawrence of Lawrence of Arabia in learning to be a person when all the humans it knows have rejected it and left it alone. And also why you shouldn't leave said artificial intelligence alone for two and a half years to be contacted and suborned by the aliens.
Also, he and Charlize Theron = hottest brother and sister act since Romeo and Juliet.
But mostly, this movie was HILARIOUSLY RIDICULOUSLY STUPID.
(There was one genuinely sort of creepy bit, which was Michael Fassbender, hanging out in the Uncanny Valley, telling Noomi Rapace she was pregnant with a hideous alien thing and then denying her an abortion while she screamed GET IT OUT OF ME. That was actually sort of creepy? And briefly made me think they were doing an interesting abortion-politics thing? And then it just went and got completely stupid again immediately thereafter.
Relatedly, I am forced to assume that the ending of the movie is something Noomi Rapace hallucinates while she is hemorrhaging to death from waaaaay too much running and way too many blows to the gut immediately after major abdominal surgery. Which is good because that means creepy David is still lying decapitated and alone on the alien planet and not piloting a ship toward some new world or worlds he can infect.)
So, yeah, we walked out of the movie and I just kept repeating "I can't create life!" and giggling because WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT.