dira: Allison Argent, smiling delightedly (Allison - Smile)
February 2: [personal profile] iulia commands, &Canon Het Ships; Discuss. :D

As Iulia so compactly points out, I love me a canon het ship, a fact that is virtually undetectable if you look at the stories I write. (Unless, like Iulia, you have a binder full of my earnest 14-year-old Mulder/Scully fic, in which case Where did you get that, and what do I have to do to get you to give it back without putting scans on the internet?) But show me Mulder and Scully, or John and Aeryn, or Zoe and Wash, or Booth and Bones back in seasons one and two, or Danny and Lindsay on CSI:NY, or Castle and Beckett, or Ichabod and Abbie--I swoon. I swoon and want to smoosh them together to make out and get married and have a million babies. <3_____<3 Happily with a canon het ship the show usually agrees with me on that, which is a big part of why I don't write about them. I don't need to! IT'S ALL RIGHT THERE.

I love romances as a genre. I love rom-coms where the com bit doesn't make me cringe, and if you count my mom's Lori Wick/Janette Oke/Grace Livingston Hill collection I've been reading romance novels steadily since I was seven years old--switching over to the non-Christian sexy kind when I was ten and found my mom's stash of Jude Devereaux and Kathleen E. Woodiwiss--and only started reading fewer of them when I went to college and didn't have ready access to a public library or a used bookstore that sold them (your one failing, Dawn Treader, and I have not forgotten being romance-novel-shamed that time I brought in a bag of books to trade that included a few of them). I love romances, whether they end in characters holding hands and getting married (the finding-Jesus-together bit I always just sort of skimmed over) or having torrid and physiologically improbable sex or coming back next week to fight crime together some more, (or all three, although I usually only find that in fic).

So, yes, I love me a canon het ship (I was ALL OVER Derek/Jennifer until canon made it terrible and I wait with hope for word that Sheriff/Melissa happytimes are on their way), but I don't write them. And partly it's because I'm willing to let the show do the work, and partly it's because my particular fannish trajectory means I'm surrounded by people who want to read slash fic, and partly, I think, it's because it's a lot easier for me to write romance, and especially porn, involving characters whose bodies don't too closely resemble or represent my body.

Ten or eleven years ago I found an explanation of that motive for writing slash that really resonated with me even as it didn't quite reflect my own experience--but now I'm tentatively willing to attribute it to being asexual. Since all of my real-life experiences of people being interested in having sex with me have been accompanied by this inarticulate rush of DNW, I tended to also feel just the same way about writing about women having sex. I think I can count on one hand the explicit het sex stories I've written: Frannie Vecchio getting Ray Kowalski to impregnate her, Grace Van Pelt having the most asexual sex ever with Patrick Jane, and... I guess maybe my Shaun/George story counts, but George's body is definitely not a concern there. Likewise my story about all the sex Aral and Cordelia didn't have before they got married.)

Figuring this out makes me feel like my prospects for writing het porn are improved going forward (also I have a lot of Laura/Derek to write), but I expect that I will still be willing to just sit back and watch and adore my canon het ships the vast majority of the time. ♥
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
I'm doing a give-me-topics-and-dates February meme, and the second half of February is still pretty open, so feel free to make requests!

February 1: [livejournal.com profile] alethialia, what draws you to particular characters/fandoms? Are there specific types you prefer over others? Is there a perfect storm of characteristics, so to speak?

For characters, as it says in my DW/LJ user info: The blond is just about always my favorite. The blond, or the regular, good, competent guy who tends to get overshadowed by his freakishly gifted partner/brother/colleague/boss/subordinate/bandmate(s)/etc. Bonus points for smile lines and ~MANPAIN~. As you will note, this means my favorites are essentially always male (I am now having a little Sleepy Hollow crisis, because I have no idea who my favorite is there: possibly Abbie, which would mean I was breaking type in all directions). If there is not an overshadowed regular competent guy, I will take the saddest guy whose sadness is not being satisfactorily addressed in canon or by fandom.

To wit: In Teen Wolf, Derek Hale is hands down my favorite everything forever, because he is sad and neglected and canon really, really does not address his sadness (fandom is of course ALL OVER his sadness, thank you fandom, ilu). If the show were about the grownups, the sheriff would without question be my favorite (he's even kinda blond!) and as it is I am dreadfully fond of him. In Generation Kill I started out having Brad Colbert as my favorite (SO MUCH UNADDRESSED SADNESS) and then after about six months in the fandom my brain shifted over to being a crazed Nate Fick partisan, possibly on behalf of the very sad Nate I carried around in my head or possibly because I read too much fic that I felt was not treating Nate right. In the Vorkosigan Saga I am always and forever an Aral Vorkosigan fan--he may in fact be the archetype of which all other favorite characters are shadows--because he is the saddest, most overshadowed in the narrative, most dazzlingly competent, smile-line-est of them all. My next-favorites are Mark and Ivan, both of whom are sad in their own ways, competent in their own rights, and spent so much time in Miles's shadow that their respective escapes defined the trajectory of their adult lives. Und so weiter.

For fandoms, I usually get into them backward, through fanworks or fandom squee. Tumblr gifsets were responsible for my fall into Teen Wolf and more recently my watching of Sleepy Hollow (and Legally Blonde and The Heat and... a lot of things really). I got into Generation Kill through soulbond fic, into Numb3rs through kidnapping fic, into bandom through hookerfic, popslash through a freedom fighter AU, into Due South through fanart and then kidfic. I even got into the Vorkosigan Saga because it was what my (profoundly idolized) big brother was reading, when he was sixteen and I was twelve, and the X-Files because it was what Iulia was squeeing about during gym class. The only show I can think of that I got into simply by watching the show is Buffy, and I'm not sure that counts either, since I was at a science fiction convention screening when I first saw it. So: I find my fandoms through fandom.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
SO I've missed all the previous monthly incarnations of this meme, but I'd like to give it a shot! If anyone wants to give me a topic and a day in February when they'd like me to post about it, I will endeavor to post once a day in February. (Caveat: I reserve the right to veto topics/move dates around as necessary, and will probably get impossibly behind on this at some point because my February schedule is kind of packed, but I'LL TRY!)
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
Scope note: Anonymous exchange fics are included in the Year in Review for the year in which they were revealed, so this post includes my Yuletide 2012 story, revealed on January 1, 2013, and my TW Holidays 2012 story, revealed January 5, 2013 (as well as my TW Holidays 2013 story, since it was revealed a couple of weeks ago). My stories for Yuletide 2013 will be in the 2014 Fic Year in Review.

This year I posted 22 stories in 6 fandoms, totaling just over 330,000 words.

Titles this year were quoted from Gym Class Heroes, Dar Williams, Leonard Cohen, Fall Out Boy, Rudyard Kipling, The National, Dessa, Eddie From Ohio, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and, as ever, two from The Mountain Goats mangling the lyrics to Neutral Milk Hotel's "Two-Headed Boy."

Fic List )

Fic Review Meme )
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
Question 17. What is your most proud moment?

...Well, whatever it turns out to be it is definitely not going to be this moment, when I realized that I cannot answer questions about myself without consulting [personal profile] iulia. This moment is a bit facepalmy about my codependent memory-storage practices.

The most deeply, giddily chuffed moment that springs to mind is eleven years ago--I believe in fact that it was December 18, 2002--which was the first time I got feedback on a fic I'd posted to a mailing list. Mad Poetess told me she liked my story, you guys. That was it, fandom owned my soul forever. :D

Question 18, really more of a comment. The meaning behind your blog name

My name here on Dreamwidth, as it was the very first time I got a LiveJournal, is dira. dira is a singular that doesn't actually exist in Latin--it's derived from a noun that only exists in the plural: dirae, the Furies. I chose the name Dira for myself when I was dipping a toe into popslash and all my most cherished bunnies, never to be written, involved horrible fates befalling my BSOs, which seems to be a theme that has carried forward in my writing career.

My name on LJ, tumblr, twitter, and many other places, is dsudis, which is really D. Sudis, for Dira Sudis. I modeled it on Mad Poetess, who then had [livejournal.com profile] mpoetess as an LJ handle. The Sudis part of my name is another Latin word, the genitive of sudis, which means spike. I chose that part of my name in the throes of Buffy fandom.

So in whatever form you encounter it in the titles of my various social media things: my name means Spike's Fury.

Question 19: 19. What do you collect?

Books. Books are really the main thing.

Also I now have a sufficiently prodigious collection of Christmas ornaments that they don't really all fit on the tree. That's rather pleasing to me.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
Question #15: Timeline of your day

My workdays have three different starting times (8:30, 9:30, or 11:30) depending on the day of the week, not counting the Sunday afternoon overtime shifts that crop up about ten times a year. So my timeline varies a lot.

But let's imagine that it's a Wednesday, I went to bed on time last night (ha ha ha), and it's a more or less typical day.

Something like this, ideally. )

Question #16: What's at the top of your bucket list?

Huh. I don't really have a bucket list.

I mean, on the one hand, I'm really fascinated by life and I want to know what next what next what next basically forever. I want to see my nieces and nephews (and kids of my own) grow up; I want to see how the world changes year after year. I want to read the next story and see the next movie, go to the next con and have the next slightly tipsy late-night talk. Preferably for the next seventy years or so.

On the other hand, with one thing and another (fuck cancer, let me just say) I had occasion a few years ago to think about what I would do if I wasn't going to get any of that stuff--if I knew that my time was quite limited, and I had to decide how to spend what was left. I realized I didn't care much about seeing particular new places or having special once-in-a-lifetime experiences of the kind you could plan in advance.

I decided that I would spend my time telling stories. That would be the thing I would regret, out of the set of things it's actually possible for me to do--I would regret not getting to tell the next story, and the one after that, and the one after that that I think you would really like. So I guess that's my bucket list right there: finish the next story.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
[community profile] processfest Day 9: Tools

What are your tools? What software, hardware, fancy equipment or handmade work-around do you use to create? Don't assume everyone does what you do and would be bored by your answer. It's YOUR answer. Share it with us, and we can pick up tips and suggestions from each other, or connect over the fact that we do indeed use exactly the same tools.

I used to be a very determined devotee of the Pentel RSVP Fine Point in black. )

Day 10: Favorites

What is your favorite part of what you create and how you create it? Talk about what you love!

I love fandom so much, you guys. I've said repeatedly that I need other people with me on a story idea to write, and in fandom a lot of people are already like 75% of the way with me when I say "So Derek and Stiles--" or "So Nate and Brad--" or "So Aral and Cordelia--" I love being able to write in response to other stories I'm reading, and being able to write specifically to please one person I want to make happy. I love writing something I think no one else will like and then finding out who else really wanted to read Dean Winchester getting a Bible lesson or Aral Vorkosigan having a hot young boyfriend or Brad Colbert dressed up like Santa.

I love being here with all of you. That's the best part of writing for me. ♥
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
[community profile] processfest Day 6: Skills

What is something you are really good at? What's one part of your process that you just strike out of the park, every time? Now is absolutely the time to brag. Give yourself credit. Tell us about your special skills.

I am a fucking wizard at writing long.



Day 7: Luxury Desert Island

Damn, you just got news that you're stuck in this luxury one-person resort on a desert island with no interruptions, a complete buffet of your favorite food and beverages, an iPod full of your favorite music, and anything else you need to create. What would you work on?

No interruptions means no unwanted interruptions, right? I mean, my own brain is kind of a machine for manufacturing interruptions, and as I think we've established in past posts, my process kind of requires me to talk to other people about what I'm writing, so I'm gonna need a solid high-speed internet connection if I want to create anything.

But stipulating all that plus plenty of creature comfort and a comfortably warm environment and some lovely scenery, what would I write?

Uh... basically the same stuff I write now, although hopefully a bit faster?

I would probably make more of an effort to divide my time and work on both original and fic writing, but my basic priorities would remain the same: write my hc_bingo and fandomaid stories, and then all the other next things in the order they're placed on the priority list.

There is probably some kind of irony in the fact that, if I didn't have to worry about money and therefore didn't have to spend eight hours a day at work, the thing that I would be most likely to start writing more of is... the kind of writing that might eventually generate money. There's some kind of catch-22 there.


Day 8: Pep Talk Story

Uhhh, hm. The Charlie-Eppes-hitting-himself-in-the-head-with-a-rock story is honestly my favorite one to tell about my own writing.

Jigsaw is, I suppose, my best story about a story in terms of encouraging people to stick with an idea they love. I came up with the idea in about 2004--back when OT4 was still slightly outré--and I loved it to pieces, but I was in no kind of emotional place right then to actually attempt writing Stargate SG-1 OT4 fic. The idea just lurked in my brain for the next five years, until I had a little SG-1 renaissance in 2009 and decided to start writing it, because why the hell not. I promptly hit a wall at what would have been the first sex scene, if the story had sex scenes, and wandered off for another year or so, during which [personal profile] iulia asked for it as a birthday present and I entirely failed to deliver it.

And then some set of circumstances collided and I started working on it again; I even decided to sign up for the SG-1 bigbang with it, and I wrote and wrote and wrote and got betaed and tore my hair and interpolated whole new scenes to make things work better and wrote some more and, voila! Seven years after I wanted to write it, there the story was.

So don't give up on your story, even if you think the moment for it has passed, even if you think you've lost all momentum and can never find it again. If you love the story, it will wait for you, and sooner or later you'll find your way to the end.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
Question #14. If you won the lottery...

Oh man. @______@ I have a plan. )
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
[community profile] processfest Day 5: Collaborators

Tell us about your go-to creative buddies. You don't have to name names, but this is the place to talk about what your collaborator brings to your creative process, how the two-or-three-or-many of you work together, how you figured out how to work together, and why it works. None of us create entirely alone, so who gives you a hand when you stumble? Who helps you get unstuck? Who is that person who always understands what you were trying to do and helps you make it happen?

[personal profile] iulia is, of course, the person who always understands what I was trying to do (no matter how often I stomp away from her beta comments insisting that she Doesn't Understand My Art: she does, sometimes better than I do, since she also understands the part where it needs to be intelligible to readers).

I'm too much of a control-freak about my writing to co-write with anyone; I can't even do chatfic in the round-robin passing-the-thread-back-and-forth way I see other people doing it, unless I don't care about the story at all. If I care enough about the story to actually write it, it has to be mine alone while I do so.

But Iulia, and other betas and audiencers and so on, are an intrinsic part of my writing process; I can't write a story that I can't first tell to someone and convince them of. And I need betas at every other stage of the game, too, because in addition to rampantly abusing commas and sentence structure I tend to go off the rails in really weird ways sometimes.

One of my favorite stories to tell about this is the time [personal profile] missmollyetc saved me from having Charlie Eppes hit himself in the head with a rock. It was somewhere in the depths of Missing Persons, well over a year into the writing of it, long after the story had gotten altogether too far into my head, and it seemed like such a good idea at the time, and I think I had even run that sequence by other people and not been dissuaded from it, and then Molly came along and said, "Really? A rock? That's what you're going with?" and I said "...No. Wow. No. Sorry."

So, thank you Molly! And thank you Iulia! And thank you every single other person in the last eleven years who has attempted to keep me pointing in the direction of writing better fiction. I could not do it without you. ♥
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
Question 12: What's inside your fridge?

Hmmm, I'm not actually home, so let's see how far I can get with this from memory!

Red Brita pitcher, probably with about an inch of water in it.
Diet Coke!
The last of the batch of (incredibly Americanized blue-collar family recipe) pasta fagioli I made last week.
Parmesan cheese.
Half a jar of gravy.
Butter, cream cheese spread, grape jam, probably some other condiments.
A lot of food that belongs to my roommate.
Possibly some limp celery and ancient apples in the crisper drawer.
There are also some frozen pizzas in the freezer that are mine, does that count?

I'm leaving this weekend to spend a week in Michigan for Christmas and tomorrow would otherwise have been grocery shopping day, so this isn't quite as sad and dire as it sounds.

Question 13. What is your earliest memory?

Huh, I don't know exactly. My family moved at Christmastime a couple of months after I turned four, so I have this handy demarcation in my memories: anything I remember at the old house is a memory from when I was three or four years old. So I have this clutch of memories that are all quite early, though they are becoming mostly memories of memories--things I am accustomed to knowing that I remember.

Possibly one of the earliest--because it must have been in the summer, so I have to have been three and a half--is the memory of being deeply outraged that my dad was taking my older brothers (who would have been then six and eight) to a Tigers game without me.

In retrospect I would not have wanted to take very small me to a sporting event either, but at the time it seemed like a grossly unjust thing that boys got to do and girls did not, and I felt terribly betrayed by it.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
[community profile] processfest Day 3:

Do you work on multiple projects at once? If you do, how do you juggle them? Do they fight for your attention? Or are you singularly focused? Do you set aside specific time for one project or many projects, or do you let yourself be guided by what you want to work on the most?

Ahahahaaha oh God. Yes. Yes, multiple projects. Very yes. )


Day 4:

What do you consider a challenge for you? What is something that's hard for you? What part of your process trips you up? What do you wrestle with? What's always in your notes from your beta? What's the part of your process that makes you throw your hands up and go "This? Again? ARGH!"

1. I offset "too" and "now" with commas in a totally unnecessary way.
2. I have this penchant for writing things as reveals that don't need to be reveals, and I will contort the story to conceal some random piece of information so that it can be DRAMATICALLY REVEALED later in a way that does not actually serve the story at all, and then Iulia sighs and says, "This doesn't make sense, you need to just set this up linearly, that doesn't need to be a reveal," and I tell her she doesn't understand my ART, and then 24 hours later I say, "Um, I think I fixed it."
3. Writing basically anything that is not an emotionally charged conversation is usually cause for me whining and dragging my feet and complaining about what a stupid hobby writing is and why do I have to write ACTION SEQUENCES again or PORN, WHO CARES ABOUT PORN or WHY DO I HAVE TO DESCRIBE WHAT ANYTHING OR ANYONE LOOKS LIKE. But I'm getting pretty good at sucking it up and getting it done.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
Question #9: What are your worst habits?

Well--as exemplified by the fact that I talked this question over with [personal profile] iulia two days ago and am only now getting around to posting this, and only because I Do Not Want to do any of the writing I should really be doing--

Procrastination. Is the big one. Procrastination and also a sort of compulsive inefficient multitasking where I am constantly in a state of doing something that was not what I meant to be doing right now but I can't remember what it was that I was supposed to be doing, only imagine that sentence interrupted four times by conversations I'm having over IM or email or on Tumblr--oh god I also need to do answers for that Tumblr meme. Ahem. You see what I mean.

I am prone not to think of this so much as a bad habit as a sign that I probably ought to try Adderall (my dad and three out of four of my brothers have benefited from it at one time or another), though. Or use more phone alarms to manage my behavior. Or both.

So I'm not really sure what my actual bad habits are. I bite my nails, but less than I used to, and leave assorted messes around, but less than I used to, and for some reason I slip into the present tense when writing past, I don't know what's up with that.


Question #10: What's your best physical feature?

Tits? Hair? I get more compliments on my hair, possibly because it is a more socially acceptable thing to randomly compliment someone on. It's a very brown brown, long and shiny and normally worn up so that people are startled by it when I wear it down. Also I use kids' shampoo so it usually smells like candy. I have just recently started parting it differently, and am prone to stare admiringly at my new hairline in any available mirror, so, yes. Let's go with hair.

Question #11: List 15 of your favorite things.

1. My Christmas tree, particularly sitting by it on a dim winter morning with no other lights on.
2. My couch.
3. My snuggly warm winter robe.
4. My teddy bear, Chris Bear, who is old enough to rent a car without extra insurance.
5. Diet Coke.
6. My shiny little silver flash drive which nearly every one of my coworkers has had to return to me at some point when I left it in a computer somewhere in the building. Sorry, coworkers.
7. The bookshelf in my bedroom, which my grandfather made for my father when he was a little kid.
8. My ring.
9. My necklace of leaf-shaped glass beads.
10. My 12-year-old Uggs that still keep my feet so very warm.
11. My running shoes.
12. My shiny shiny iPhone.
13. Candy Crush, except for Level 125. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID, LEVEL 125.
14. My tattoo.
15. Fandom, in all its platforms and permutations, especially the part with you in it. YES YOU. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID! :D
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
I swear to God I am almost done procrastinating on my [livejournal.com profile] yagkyas story. Soon I will be procrastinating about Yuletide instead!

I finished my [livejournal.com profile] yagkyas story and it is off to beta! Now I can do stuff that is not that with a clear conscience! :D

Meanwhile, [community profile] processfest Day two:
What's your first spark of inspiration? What makes you decide to work on a new project? What's your first step? Is it always the same or does your method change? How do you begin when you create?

This is where we start. )
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
Uhhh. Well, my handbag is a Swiss Army laptop backpack (this one, approximately). I used to carry a reasonably-sized Timbuktu messenger bag, but I started, and by started I mean "continued until I finally had to take notice" to get this really startlingly intense shooting pain through my right hip, which was where I carried it. Not all the time, but enough to be, you know, more often than I wanted to feel startlingly intense pain in my hip. So I thought: maybe symmetry is better, and I switched to using my backpack all the time. Voila, no more hip pain.

I also thought: maybe carrying less shit is better, and started pushing my personal boundaries in terms of trying to go out with just my tiny ID wallet (license, library card, Allstate Motor Club card, debit card, and punch card for the pizza slice place by work) and phone and keys when I can. So I'm getting pretty good at doing that at times when I'm going out to run errands or hang out with people or generally don't expect to be sitting somewhere a long time and need six potential forms of entertainment and a stock of drugs.

So all that said, the contents of my bag when I emptied it out to check: A lot of stuff. )
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
...Because obviously the key to me posting lots is a) memes where I talk about myself and b) really, really not wanting to work on my [livejournal.com profile] yagkyas fic. SO!

[community profile] processfest Day 1 Prompt: Where do you create? What does your work space look like?



This is where the magic happens. I sit in my recliner at the right-hand end of the sectional with my feet up and misuse my lapdesk as a horizontal surface to hold my Diet Coke, and in between refreshing Tumblr and whining to people over IM and IRC about how much I hate writing, I write.

You can't see it from screen glare, but I also put 750words.com in the picture, because that is also where I do a lot of my writing. When all other motivation fails, sometimes the satisfaction of keeping a streak alive or earning another animal badge gets me moving. I didn't even know there WAS a badge for racking up a total of 500,000 words on the site (which took me three or four years) until I hit that milestone and the badge appeared. WHO KNOWS WHAT I COULD STUMBLE INTO NEXT? Maybe there's a special badge for writing a really epic number of NC-17 rated 750s. MAYBE I WILL FIND OUT. FOR SCIENCE.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
I try not to spend a lot of energy hating things, so I don't really have a good mental list of things I hate. I guess it's sort of:

1. Almost anything my roommate does or does not do that comes to my attention, especially between the hours of midnight and 4AM.
2. "Moreso" as a compound word.
3. Failure to correctly punctuate plurals. It's only "the Hale's house" or "the Stilinski's house" if we are in a milieu where we refer to the head of a family with a definite article a la a clan chieftain, in which case, by all means, tell me all about the Hale and her house. But most of the time it's "The Hale house" or "The Hales' house." I'm serious. Please learn this.
4. Ugh, periods. The menstrual kind, not the punctuation kind, despite where this falls in the list.
5. People who call a question-answering phone service and don't pause for any kind of greeting or context before barking out "Phone number for the mubmglaghathing at hgaasstreet."
6. People who respond to the question "How can I help you?" with "I hope so!"
7. People who respond to "How can I help you?" with "How are you doing today?"
8. People who ask me my name in a customer service interaction.
9. So, okay, like 80% of the members of the public I have to deal with at work.
10. My family's communication strategies or lack thereof, jfc.


...That's probably enough hating things for one morning before I've even gotten to work. We'll just. Leave that there.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
1. Hearing: REM, "Sweetness Follows" (I nearly always have music playing) and the six o'clock bells from the church down the street, and the boiling pot of noodles mac and cheese. Aaand the timer going off.

2. Sight: My double reflection in the kitchen window; the folded cloth napkins, bowl of apples, and scented candle with which my roommate dressed up the kitchen table for her parents' Thanksgiving visit.

3. Taste: Kraft Spirals mac and cheese. Om nom nom.

4. Smell: Mostly the mac and cheese. Lemon dishsoap from cleaning the pot before I used it. Nothing, thankfully, from the direction of the trash can.

5. Touch: Heat radiating off the pot of mac and cheese between my arms as I type, the rough-and-smooth texture variations of the keys under my fingers, the softness of my warm robe and fuzzy slippers.


Allllso I wrote almost 2000 words of Teen Wolf hookerfic today because apparently that is what happens when Nano is officially over and fic exchange deadlines are starting to loom menacingly.
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
1. Bastille - Pompeii. So catchy!

2. The Mountain Goats - Steal Smoked Fish. I had it stuck in my head for an entire afternoon at work, and it makes a much better mantra for keeping calm than my previous favorite Mountain Goats song to sing to myself at work, which was No Children.

3. The National - Fake Empire. Uggggh, I love this song so much forever and ever amen. THAT VOICE.

4. Hallelujah, various artists. I still have six different covers in my regular playlist. It may not be a phase anymore.

5. pomDeter (Nine Inch Nails & Carly Rae Jepsen) - Call Me a Hole. I heard "Call Me Maybe" in a restaurant yesterday and all I could think about was how much I love this mashup.

Aaaaand it's after Thanksgiving so I've been adding Christmas songs to my playlist so ESSENTIAL CHRISTMAS SONGS I AM EXCITED TO LISTEN TO!

6. Vienna Teng - The Atheist Christmas Carol. This. Yes.

7. Sufjan Stevens - Come On! Let's Boogey to the Elf Dance! Because all the best Christmas songs have exclamation points.

8. Annie Lennox - I'l Est Ne Le Divin Enfant. Because all the best Christmas songs that don't have exclamation points are in French.

9. Bruce Cockburn - Les Anges Dans Nos Campagnes. Seriously, Christmas songs in French = A+.

10. Emerson, Lake and Palmer - I Believe in Father Christmas. My favorite Christmas song of all for years now, ever since it was in a ... Canadian bank commercial? In like 2004? Anyway, I love it to bits. ♥


31 Questions. )
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
While I can anxiety-spiral with the best of them, and while I have the same constant gnawing worry about money as, idk, basically everyone alive in America in the 21st Century, I'm not actually afraid of much in the big picture way. I'm a disgustingly persistent optimist, and I've had a lot of good luck in my life, and I really do mostly trust that things are going to work out okay.

So things I'm afraid of work out to, like:

1. Edges, falling off of them.
2. Pigeons, them flying in my face.
3. This story I'm writing is completely terrible and I will never be able to make it right.

(I know, I know. The pigeons will not actually fly into my face. I know.)

31 questions. )

August 2017

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