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okay, one--two more things.
Other side effects of watching a lot of The Dog Whisperer:
1) I really want to go reread that story where Ryan turns into a beagle.
2) I am now contemplating the scenario where Cesar gets called in by bandom boys because this dog that they got right after their bandmate disappeared, he's been acting really weird and obsessive and unhappy and they love him to pieces but they're really worried about him. Help, Dog Whisperer!
And Cesar walks in, starts to chat about what's going on with the dog, and then the dog walks in the room and Cesar is like, "Whoa. Guys. That's not a dog."
They look at the dog--four legs, waggy tail, floppy ears, cold wet nose--and back at Cesar. "It's... dude, that's our dog."
Cesar is all, "It doesn't act like a dog, it doesn't move like a dog, it doesn't think like a dog. He is looking at us and listening to us right now like a human looks and listens. That is not a dog."
The dog is all FINALLY SOMEONE IS FUCKING LISTENING TO ME, THANK GOD. I WAS GOING TO HAVE TO KILL THEM ALL IN THEIR SLEEP IF THIS DIDN'T WORK OUT.
Cesar says, "How did you decide to call me for help with him?"
They look at each other. "Uh... the dog kept turning on your show."
"Right, okay, maybe you have never seen a dog before? THAT IS NOT A DOG."
And so on.
1) I really want to go reread that story where Ryan turns into a beagle.
2) I am now contemplating the scenario where Cesar gets called in by bandom boys because this dog that they got right after their bandmate disappeared, he's been acting really weird and obsessive and unhappy and they love him to pieces but they're really worried about him. Help, Dog Whisperer!
And Cesar walks in, starts to chat about what's going on with the dog, and then the dog walks in the room and Cesar is like, "Whoa. Guys. That's not a dog."
They look at the dog--four legs, waggy tail, floppy ears, cold wet nose--and back at Cesar. "It's... dude, that's our dog."
Cesar is all, "It doesn't act like a dog, it doesn't move like a dog, it doesn't think like a dog. He is looking at us and listening to us right now like a human looks and listens. That is not a dog."
The dog is all FINALLY SOMEONE IS FUCKING LISTENING TO ME, THANK GOD. I WAS GOING TO HAVE TO KILL THEM ALL IN THEIR SLEEP IF THIS DIDN'T WORK OUT.
Cesar says, "How did you decide to call me for help with him?"
They look at each other. "Uh... the dog kept turning on your show."
"Right, okay, maybe you have never seen a dog before? THAT IS NOT A DOG."
And so on.